We are all wounded just by being born into a physical body, we experience our first form of separation. The separation from the spiritual realms where we once came from and so long to return to – some of us for a lifetime.
Friedrich Nietzsche stated in one of his quotes: “To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.” and the wounded healer knows what that means.
Yes, we all are wounded and the older we get the bigger the wounds and deeper the scars. There is no way around making experiences which are accompanied by the pain of realization. The realization that things not always the way we thought they would be. That people are not always what they seem to be. And that growing older and ageing is not only a physical process but also a mental and emotional one. Within these experiences we will discover the feelings of separation, abandonment, isolation, betrayal, abuse and it will leave us, speechless, heartbroken and doubting ourselves. We might sometimes wonder how much we still able to take on? How much more pain we can cope with?
Why do we need to go through all this? Why?
Often we are unable to find any answers, all we have is the pain that penetrates deep down into our hearts and souls. We lose ourselves in a spiral of questioning, doubting and not knowing what to do. The only solution to finally avoid the pain, is to avoid life we think. Once we do so, we start to lose ourselves in drugs, work, opinions, convictions, any kind of addictions and very often even in others. As long as it numbs the pain we welcome any distraction that is offered to us.
The more we experience the more we build a wall around our hearts, souls and bodies. Day by day the wall gets a bit taller, a bit tighter just to make sure that the next time we won’t get too much hurt again.
But we totally forget that the bricks we use for building our walls are made of disappointment, hurt, distrust, fear, doubts and misunderstanding. All these things we so desperately would like to get rid off, are clinging to us like a child to its mother. We are convinced that life is hard, painful and full of suffering. This is often all we see.
And while we spend our lives in jobs we don’t like, relationships that are non-supportive or even toxic, running after the false values like status and money, we pretend to be fine. We hold on because of fear and we are far too scared to do only one step into the unknown. Slowly but steady our suppressed emotions will find ways to express itself in physical, mental or emotional issues and illness. The symptoms are clear, we are angry, fed up, tired, exhausted, we are burnt out we are ready to give up.
We all will experience such a point in our lives, some of us even more than once.
The wounded healer awakens
“In the midst of crisis, lies great opportunities”
– Albert Einstein
This is true, if we only could see it as such but that is probably the hardest part. We might got hurt by the realization that life is not what we thought it would be and within this there lies an ocean of opportunities. Great opportunities to see life from a different perspective. But it lies alone in our very own responsibility if we hold on to our past memories and build our wall full of frustration and pain. Or we might explore a chance that whatever hurt us can be released if we allow it to do so. What if we discover that we might shaped and formed by our past but we can transform ourselves in the present moment and therefore build a brighter future. This is the path of the wounded healer – this might the path of all of us. Rather then avoiding the pain, the uncomfortable feeling of suffering and turn it into a force of transformation. For ourselves and others.
Once we decide to look within and honestly allow anything that resides there to stay. Just for the moment we will accept that people disappointed us, that life did hurt us. Only for now we try not to run away but take a deep breath and accept whatever is. Healing takes place. The moment we stop to change things or make them undone we align ourselves with their existence and they will transform.
The moment you accept who you are – totally – and fully with all your flaws, weaknesses and insecurities – you will transform.
Let the pain become your friend, let it sit with you at the table, let it be painful.
But most important of all – don’t run away from it.
Once you sat in and with your pain, once you accepted its existence, once you treated it as a friend it will start talking to you.
It will tell you a lot of things. Who has caused it, where, when, how and suddenly it all comes to the surface again. Like a movie the scenes are flickering in the blink of an eye and you can feel it deep down in your heart. It hurts.
Maybe even after years and years, once you befriend yourself with your pain it seems like yesterday. It burns and turns, it screams and shouts, it rages and fights. Like a fire, it will burn everything into your conscious mind.
And all you have to do is to hold the torch while you walk through the dark, knowing you will survive.
The healing journey
The wounded healer longs for this journey all his life because he/she has not forgotten about his origin. Deep within his/her soul he/she knows that life maybe is suffering but at the same time – life is the healer.
Once we have awaken to realize that everything is made of energy and that is what we truly are, we finally will find direction. We will follow the call which is pulling us away from any concepts created by man. We will start out searching for answers, understanding and might along the way we will come across the truth.
Suddenly we will clearly see how everything is connected with everything, that coincidences don’t exist and we create our own reality. We will understand that attachment is not only a word but an energetic string we need to release if we want to be free. Free from the past and all we learnt and still hold on to. Letting go of our educated minds and the fixed ideas how life supposed to be. We will set out on a journey that will bring us back to the point where we once started. We have to walk through old pain and suffering again only to learn how to let it go.
Along the way we will deeper and deeper discover the truth that has always been hidden within us. We will seek out the right people at the right time, we will learn that our heart needs to be cracked open again so we can overcome fears, face our demons and sit with our pain.
We will ask to try new things, open our minds, start all over again so we can finally transform and heal. From the concept we carried with us for far too long. Layer after layer we let go of what was has been and welcome the new. Our journey from the dark will constantly lead to the light.
More and more we will understand the power within and the power on the outside. We will embrace the meaning of change and the importance of being honest with ourselves. The more clarity we seek the more we will find what we been asking for. Till we one day, resurrect under all the broken pieces and rise from the ground like the phoenix from the ashes.
From suffering to spiritual meaning
Once we made it all the way and we explored our own suffering and pain we are ready for the next step. We survived, we have gone through it, we transformed. Here we stand, naked in our very own truth, knowing what it means to heal oneself – we finally ready to heal others.
The wounded healers path is the path of transformation, of self realisation and exploration. Once we have integrated what we left out for far too long we will find peace. Once we faced what we suppressed and we appreciated what we first denied, we are there. Able to sit with our own pain, we are able to sit with the pain of others. Able to name our own wounds, we are finally able to name the wounds of others.
This is how we return where we once started, finally we remember who we really are. We transformed our suffering into understanding. And by assisting others to heal we will experience the meaning of our own suffering. The wounded healer turned his/her wound of separation into the healing power of compassion and the emptiness has transformed into the abundance of opportunities to seek for integration.
Medium – Healer – Soulactivist
Julie Jurgan is a medium, healer and Soulactivist. She offers One-to-One Sessions ( Readings & Meditations) via Skype and in person. Her healing sessions are available in person as well as via distance. Her healing sessions are powerful and transforming. If you want to know what sessions Julie offers please have a look here…
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